"Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young. The greatest thing in life is to keep your mind young."
– Henry Ford
The Importance of Choosing A Mentor
Throughout life we will never reach a peak. We may accomplish goals and achieve great endeavors, but the most we can give in life is where we are currently.
There is always room to grow, learn, and develop. Mentors help bring the best out of us and help us to believe in ourselves.
Good mentors do more than just encourage us, they push us to be better.
Great mentors help other people to see what they see - the person that they can become. Great mentors speak on and help reveal to their mentee the many strengths, talents, gifts, and abilities they possess.
It is extremely important to choose the right mentor. If one finds a bad mentor, or the relationship is not a good fit, the perception of mentorship can be dampened. However, when the right mentor is found, it can be life changing - not only in the present, but for the future. For we can change the trajectory of our life, but only if we are willing to change ourselves.
Here are nine considerations when choosing a mentor. They are the following:
- Are they accessible?
- Are they someone you would want to keep in touch with long-term?
- Are they able to provide immediate value?
- What is their experience?
- Are they someone you respect?
- What characteristics do they possess?
- Encouraging, integrity, wise
- Are their worldviews and philosophies aligned with yours?
- Will they challenge you and reprove you when necessary?
- Are they good listeners and willing to encourage you?
Let’s unpack each consideration, below!
Nine Considerations When Choosing A Mentor
1. Are they accessible?
Is it easy to meet with them? How busy are they? Are they retired or working?
Finding out how accessible your mentor is will help dictate the relationship moving forward.
It is important to both be extremely clear with expectations, lest unappreciation, dissatisfaction, or disappointment take place.
2. Are they someone you would want to keep in touch with long-term?
Are you looking for a few meetings with your mentor? Or are you desiring to build a relationship that will last a lifetime?
Finding out the frequency of how often you meet and for how long will help you consider which mentor is best for you.
3. Are they able to provide immediate value?
Will this mentor provide immediate value? Or are they still learning about that which you desire to learn?
It is always good to learn from those who have gone before us, but also those who have completed that which we desire to accomplish.
Do they have a successful marriage - willing to communicate differences and approach conflicts with humility and gentleness?
Have they not only started a business, but built it to become a 7-to-8 figure company?
Are they a man or woman who takes their faith in God seriously and is unwavering when persecuted for what they believe?
Find out where they are, based upon what is important to you.
Immediate value is something you want to look for - not someone who has only gone part way or only become half of what you desire in your mentor.
We are all growing, the question is how far along we are in our growth and if our mentor is at the place where we want to be.
4. What is their experience?
Do they have a Masters in Business, but have never started a business?
Book smart is great, but only if applied.
One can be a great reader, while not having accomplished or applied anything of what they read.
Ideas are great and knowledge is powerful, but only if they are acted on and applied.
Make sure you understand a potential mentor's experience - not only from their past and what they have been through, but also with who they have become throughout their journey.
It would be very difficult to be mentored by a billionaire if that person was conceited, narcissistic, trampled on people to get to the top, and only desired to mentor to feel good about themselves.
True mentorship is about relationships. True mentorship is done when the mentor not only has experience, but also the history to prove it.
Always discern someone’s present. If they haven’t done it, don’t trust it. Good words fall to the ground without a solid base of being applied by the one speaking.
5. Are they someone you respect?
Is this someone you respect as a person? Or do you just respect what they have done?
Methods of how things are accomplished are just as important as the accomplishment itself.
Never strive to be mentored by someone who is selfish, unethical, immoral, or willing to go to any lengths to get what they want. Odds are they have hurt many people in the process to reveal the glamor of things and accolades.
Strive to find someone you will respect for their character. For character is greater than accomplishment.
6. What characteristics do they possess?
Are they loving? Humble? Intelligent? Honest? Brave? Empathetic? Encouraging? Caring? Kind? Willing to say what is tough for your greater good?
Characteristics are absolutely essential. Depending upon the person, one characteristic may be more important than another. The key is to find what is important for you and what characteristics you desire your mentor to have.
7. Are their worldviews and philosophies aligned with yours?
You always want someone that challenges you along the way, but with polar opposite worldviews and philosophies, it can be tough to build a concrete relationship that isn’t willing to converse about differences.
If a Hindu and Christian had a mentorship relationship, clearly this would be difficult. One believes in reincarnation, while the other believes in the afterlife of Heaven or Hell (based upon if people are willing to repent of their sins and believe that Jesus Christ is Lord and Savior).
These different views will dictate how one lives and goes about life.
Make sure you find someone who will challenge you, but will also be in agreement with you on certain worldviews and philosophies. This will provide camaraderie and will help the relationship to build greater trust.
It’s not that we can’t learn from people of different worldviews and philosophies, but if there is a constant butting of heads, it can be difficult to want to listen, grow, and develop a deep, intimate relationship.
8. Will they challenge you and reprove you when necessary?
Good mentors don’t allow people to progress in bad habits and bad ways.
Sometimes, we must be both challenged and reproved. If we desire a relationship of constant fluff, we shouldn’t expect to go very far.
It is absolutely essential that we find someone who will push us.
Proverbs 27:5-6 (ESV) states, “Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy.”
Those who love us will not allow us to continue in ways that are unprofitable, unproductive, and leading nowhere. Sometimes the truth is tough to hear, but so long as it is done in love and with the right intentions, it should be received with a grateful heart.
Seek to find someone who will lovingly challenge and reprove you. Those who do so in kindness and gentleness want only what is best for you.
9. Are they good listeners and willing to encourage you?
A great mentor will not only give advice, but will listen to you.
Those who desire to listen intently and answer based upon what has been said will be those who have your best interest at heart.
When someone is willing to listen more than talk, they will better know how to encourage you and push you.
As the Greek Philosopher, Epictetus, once said, “We have two ears and one mouth so that we can listen twice as much as we speak.”
Find someone who will listen and truly care about what you have to say. A great mentor listens to your questions, your concerns, and your heart.
Take the Next Step & Join InstantMentor
Now that we have reviewed the nine considerations when choosing a mentor, we would encourage you to read the following articles:
- How to Compare & Choose the Best Mentor
- Top Five Fears of InstantMentor
- A Review of InstantMentor - Pros & Cons
Are you feeling ready to sign up? Visit InstantMentor and download our app.
Get started today! It’s free. No one ever regretted growing. Begin your journey with mentorship and ascend to new heights! The future is limitless.
Become all you can be, and join InstantMentor now.
Lance VanTine
Co-Founder & CEO
